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Author Topic: The Worst...Corniest.....Jokes in the Word Thread  (Read 4078 times)

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Offline bazza

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This Thread is to post the corniest....silliest....worst jokes you can find

Can you find the worst joke ever?

Here's a few to start off:-

A blond walked into up to an airport ticket counter and asked
to buy a round trip ticket.

"Where to?" Asked the smiling ticket agent.

The blonde rolled her eyes and said, "Duh, back here!"



What's brown and sticky?

A stick



There were two goldfish in a tank. What did one say to the other?

"How do you drive this damn thing!"



Two peas on a plate, which one was married...... none they were both batchelors



Can you find worse ones than that

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Offline bazza

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re: The Worst...Corniest.....Jokes in the Word Thread
« Reply #1 on: Jan 03, 2006, 10:51 »
Two trucks loaded with a thousand copies of Roget's Thesaurus collided as they left a publishing house last Thursday.

According to news reports witnesses were stunned, startled, aghast, taken aback, stupefied....

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Gadget

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re: The Worst...Corniest.....Jokes in the Word Thread
« Reply #2 on: Jan 03, 2006, 21:38 »
A guy walked in to a bar


















and said

















"ouch"

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Iqonac

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re: The Worst...Corniest.....Jokes in the Word Thread
« Reply #3 on: Jan 04, 2006, 21:35 »
Horse walked into a bar.

The barman said...

Why the long face?

(Think I should shoot myself for that one!)

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Offline Credo

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re: The Worst...Corniest.....Jokes in the Word Thread
« Reply #4 on: Jan 04, 2006, 22:14 »
Why did the one handed man cross the road



















To get to the second hand shop  :roll:

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Offline Shane

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re: The Worst...Corniest.....Jokes in the Word Thread
« Reply #5 on: Jan 04, 2006, 22:24 »
Man walking through airport door sideways ...




Going to




Bangcock

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incredabuz

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Re: The Worst...Corniest.....Jokes in the Word Thread
« Reply #6 on: Jan 08, 2006, 23:16 »
By Far the worst joke in the world




a man goes into a bakers shop and asks for a loaf of bread


the baker says

white or brown


the man says


 it do'sent matter i have my bike outside

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jetster

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re: The Worst...Corniest.....Jokes in the Word Thread
« Reply #7 on: Jan 09, 2006, 00:26 »
Two parrots sitting on a perch, one turns to the other and says "can you smell fish?"

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Offline bazza

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re: The Worst...Corniest.....Jokes in the Word Thread
« Reply #8 on: Jan 10, 2006, 14:39 »
Couldn't resist another:

A Chinaman has 5,000 children, a glass eye and a wooden leg; what do they call him?






























Dad!

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Offline bazza

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re: The Worst...Corniest.....Jokes in the Word Thread
« Reply #9 on: Jan 10, 2006, 14:50 »
A bloke starts his new job at the zoo and is given three tasks.

The first is to clear the exotic fish pool of weeds. He starts on this when suddenly a huge fish leaps out and bites him. He is not going to let a fish have a go so he beats the offending fish to death with a spade.

Realising that his boss is not going to be best pleased, he tries to find a way to hide the dead fish. He hits on the brilliant idea of giving the fish to the lions as lions will eat anything. So he throws the fish into the lion's cage.

He then moves on to his second job, which is to clear out the monkey house. He goes in and a couple of chimps starts throwing coconuts at him. Un-amused he swipes at the chimps with his spade, killing them instantly. He's really worried now, so what does he do? He feeds the chimps to the lions, because lions eat anything. He hurls them into the lion's cage.

Anyway, he moves on to his last job, which is to collect honey from South American bees. He starts on this and quickly gets attacked by the bees. Alarmed, he grabs his spade and smashes the bees as hard as he can, squashing them to death. By this point he is not too worried about the death of bees as he knows what to do by now. He throws them into the lion's cage, because lions eat anything.

Later that day a new lion arrives at the zoo. It wanders up to another lion and says "What's the food like in here?".

The other lion says: "Absolutely brilliant, today we had Fish, Chimps and Mushy Bees"

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Offline bazza

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re: The Worst...Corniest.....Jokes in the Word Thread
« Reply #10 on: Jan 10, 2006, 14:54 »
An elderly lady goes into the doctor and tells him - "Doctor, I don't know what the problem is, but I've been farting all the time. It's not really a problem socially because they don't make any noise and don't smell. I just can't stop farting all the time. In fact while I've been in here I must have farted at least 20 times."

The doctor nods and gives her some pills. "Here take these for two weeks and come see me again when you are done."

So she takes the pills and returns two weeks later as instructed. Infuriated, she confronted the doctor. "What kind of medicine is this? I'm still farting just as much? They still don't make any noise, but now they stink terribly!"

The doctor nodded, "It's alright, now that we have your sinus' cleared up, we'll work on your hearing next!"

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Offline Credo

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re: The Worst...Corniest.....Jokes in the Word Thread
« Reply #11 on: Mar 30, 2006, 13:28 »
Two antennas met on a roof, fell in love and got married. The ceremony wasn't much, but the reception was excellent.

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Please don't confuse my personality with my attitude
My personality is who I am, my attitude depends on who I am talking to.

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